The Nairobi church’s married couples gathered on the evening of Wednesday December 11th and the morning and early afternoon of Thursday December 12th for this year’s marriage workshop. It was a workshop with a difference, based on the book, "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman, and included a session where spouses got to talk with each other and share from the speeches presented. The theme for the workshop was "Learning Your Spouse’s Love Language."

George and Anne Irungu, leaders of the East regions in Nairobi, opened up the workshop on Wednesday by explaining how we each have a love tank and how it is the responsibility of each of us to learn the expression of love (dubbed "love language") that keeps our spouse’s love tank full. If not, our spouse will run on an empty tank and, as with a vehicle, for example, the results will be destructive. We each need to know our spouse’s primary love language so that by "speaking" it we can keep our spouse radiant, confident and ebullient.

In Thursday’s opening session, Steve and Carol Mukenya, leaders of the Central regions, helped all to understand three of the five love languages – "words of affirmation", "quality time" and "physical touch". They made clear the power of kind and encouraging words to inspire our spouses and the bonding effect of making time for each other rather than being so busy with other people and pursuits that we alienate ourselves from our spouses.

After the couples’ session, the leaders of the Kibera region, William and Victoria Auki, wrapped up the workshop by explaining the remaining two of the five love languages – "giving gifts" and "acts of service". While we all love receiving gifts, if this is your spouse’s primary love language then you need to make a special effort to make it your strength to give gifts. As the Auki’s made clear, gifts do not necessarily have to be costly.

As it was made clear throughout the workshop, love is a choice. The onus is now on each husband and wife to make the decision to know what their partner’s primary love language is, then learn that language, and, as both do so with all their hearts, true love will reign – maybe not as a dizzying emotional high like when we first fell in love, but certainly with equal excitement and greater depth.